mattandkelly

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

The Happiness Project

Early this month I read a book called The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin. It's a bit of a self-help book, but still worth a look. Gretchen Rubin wrote this book as sort of a "New Year's Resolution Project". Each chapter in the book represents a particular month. So there are 12 chapters and for each chapter she worked on an idea for a whole month. In January she worked on being more energetic. In February she worked on relationships and so on. The book is long, but if you can find it at your library, it's worth a good skimming. Here is the book website:

http://www.happiness-project.com/

Also, one of my favorite quotes from the relationship section is:

"There is no love, there are only proofs of love" (Reverdy)

The idea is this... Matt can't EXPERIENCE my love for him unless I show it. If I have love for him in my heart, there will be proof of it. It's not always the love in our hearts that shows to our loved ones. They must experience the PROOFS of that love in order for them to feel and experience the love at all. So following Ms. Rubin's advice in her book, I've been practicing showing proofs of my love to Matt. For example: not nagging him, being pleasant to him, forgiving him for his faults instead of drawing attention to them, not giving him "job assignments" and telling him that I love him every chance I get. A good spouse is VERY hard to find. Don't let the passage of time cause you to forget to value your loved ones.

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3 Comments:

  • At January 26, 2011 at 11:50 AM, Blogger diana ferguson said…

    Great advice, Have I told you I love you lately. You are a wonder.

     
  • At January 26, 2011 at 2:35 PM, Blogger Unknown said…

    I love you too Mom.

     
  • At February 2, 2011 at 8:49 PM, Blogger Sarah said…

    Kelly, that is very good advice. Its definitely always better to let go of frustrations and anger against the other person. I read a story last week in my bereavement counseling textbook about a woman who had a fight with her husband. He stormed off to the den and locked the door. She let him sleep in there that night and slipped a note under the door in the morning, apologizing. She told him to be ready to go to their favorite place for dinner that night if he forgave her. She got home and the door was still shut. I'm sure you can see where this is going...a day later, she went in and (later) found out he had an aneurysm and died, but was at least happy he got her note of apology - he was on the bed with the phone book open to their favorite restaurant, probably getting set to make a reservation. You never know, so you're right - its best to always treat the other person as good as possible. Good post!!! :)

     

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